- Raising Cane
  • Home
  • Random Post
  • About
  • BUCOLIC SCENES
  • Offensive Stuff
    • Hi Google Commands
  • Videos
    • Just Kids
    • Opening Night
    • Just Kids – 1986 – June (Hockley Church)
    • Just Kids – Tribute – Final Show
    • 1989 Amy’s Grade School Graduation
    • The Full Duck
    • Summer 1987
    • M.I.S. Behavin – Michigan Speedway
    • Route 66 – Chicago to St. Louis
    • April Fools Day 2007
    • Saint Paddies Day 2007
  • Contact Me
Home » Humor » The Ides of March – Random thoughts!

The Ides of March – Random thoughts!

Posted on March 15, 2016 by Chris Cane
Cartoon by Mark Aguilar

My goal for 2015 was to lose just 50 pounds. Only 60 to go.

I ate salad for dinner! Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.

How to prepare Tofu:
1. Throw it in the trash.
2. Grill some Meat.

I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.

I don’t mean to brag but……I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours and 20 minutes.

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

Kids today don’t know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.

Senility has been a smooth transition for me.

Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero out they closed school?
Me neither.

I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented….I forgot where I was going with this.

I love being over nearly 70. I learn something new every day…….and forget 5 others.

A thief broke into my house last night……He started searching for money so I woke up and searched with him.

My dentist told me I need a crown. I was like: I KNOW, right?

I think I’ll just put an “Out of Order” sticker on my forehead and call it a day.

PS:  Sunday, March 13, 2016 Daylight Savings Time began. Did you remember to set your bathroom scale back 10 pounds on Saturday night.

My real concern is the Ides of April or Tax Day!


Cartoon by Mark Aguilar

Cartoon by Mark Aguilar

Share Button
Tweet

Share this:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Print
  • Email
Posted in Humor, My Life, Pure Bullshit | Tags: Ides of March |
« The absolutely most amazing thing about Spaghetti and Sex!
How Not To Get Laid »

Search Me

Select a Category

  • Amjo Related (2)
  • Bastards (2)
  • Computing (12)
  • Humor (322)
  • Might be true! (26)
  • My Life (220)
  • Pure Bullshit (10)
  • Rare Miscellany (105)
  • True Stuff (22)
  • Useful Stuff (16)

Got comments?

  • Rick Quinn on My Colonoscopy Journal
  • David Frederick Read on Introducing “The Goose”
  • Chris Cane on I stood by your bed last night.
  • Colleen on I stood by your bed last night.
  • Katy B on The Elopement of Chris and Cheryl
May 2023
M T W T F S S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031  
« Sep    

Stuff I said!

The contents of this blog and website are not designed to slander or hurt anybody of any race or creed. I sometimes laugh at myself or even a friend or five. If you feel you have been slighted in any way whatsoever, please let me know so I can change what was said.

Take a Gander At:

  • Offensive-stuff
  • A Bucolic-scene
  • Contact me at chris@canetech.com or my contact page.
  • Home
  • Random Post
  • About
  • BUCOLIC SCENES
  • Offensive Stuff
  • Videos
  • Contact Me
© - Raising Cane and Other Stuff